There's a huge spider under my "new leaf"!

I am back!

Before I get started, I want to say that I am going to change the format a little around here. The news is really getting on my nerves, and when I allow myself, I become consumed with it. There are only so many things I can say about the communistic, left-wing, terrorist supporting, Bush hating, Mama Sheehan supporting, Gorbachev worshiping, Clinton praising, 9-11 conspiracy mongering, holocaust denying morons before I start to lose my focus.

Things are spiraling out of control in our world, and the Democratic Party is so convinced that the world’s problems are the product of George W. Bush, that they are wiling to blame even the weather on him; then claim that the conservatives are irrational. I have had it.

People like this can not be reasoned with. They are not worth the trouble.

So, while I will not reject the news entirely, I am going to get back to my original vision, and do more Torah studies, more of my art work, more cello posts, and the like. I am open to any and all suggestions; however – if you do not agree with the opinions on this blog, leave. Better yet, go study up and present a logical argument based on fact and rational thought. This may keep you away from the abortion clinic, or from taking the 10 Commandments off of court house lawns for a little while, but trust me; it will do you some good to use your brain for a few minutes. The ACLU can do without you for the time it takes you to study up on some factual history. Don’t be a coward, leaving comments that spew hatred and foul language, without ever conveying an intelligible idea. As members of the Left wing Democratic Party, you know who you are, and you know what I am talking about; your illiteracy and vile remarks reveal you.

...back to business...

All of this talk of vile, disgusting creeps makes for the perfect intro to something that happened to my wife tonight. She had just taken our weiner dog outside to do her business, and when she came back into the house, she had one of these on her arm:

...yes, on her arm; touching her skin, crawling up her arm. After she brushed it off (thinking it was just part of a cobweb that she walked through) she jumped back and said, "Oh my gosh!! That's the biggest spider I have ever seen in my life!"

I continued reading, unconcerned, because I know for a fact that we have seen some pretty large spiders at the St. Louis, and Indianapolis Zoo, so I figured that she was exaggerating. In hindsight, I think she meant to say, "That is the biggest spider that has ever been on my arm!!" That would have gotten my attention. Or, "Hey, is that one of those bird catching spiders - that was just on my arm?"

I nonchalantly got up and started over toward the door; then I saw it. After shuddering about fifteen times, I managed to get it into in a Mason jar (where it sits, safely by my right hand as I type). Its rear end is the size of a small grape, and its legs spread out bigger than an old silver dollar.

Man! Maaaaaaaaan! I will not sleep tonight.

It's title is: "Neoscona crucifera" of the Araneidae family. Supposedly it is "not known to cause serious effects to humans". Personally, I don't care if it was wearing an "I love Ronald Reagan" T-shirt, it still gave me the willies; and it wasn't even on my arm.

She is asleep now. I am going to bed soon, but not without a lot of contemplation, I'm sure.

Where are the rest of them? These things could be hiding anywhere; under the bed, beneath the toilet seat, in my boots, or my sock drawer, even taking refuge in my extremely manly, robust beard while I am sleeping... for all I know, one could be on my back right now, seeking revenge for the imprisonment of his mate...

...or on her arm.